Testimony

For the first time in my life, I'm sitting down to prepare what I will say when giving my testimony to people. I've given my salvation story to two very large groups, and my cancer one three times. All with minimal amounts of notice. Back in 2004, on two separate occasions I was sitting in a church and the Holy Spirit pressed on my heart that I was about to give my testimony. These were not situations I would have any reason to believe that. But He reminded me of a few verses, so I frantically looked them up while the pastor was speaking about whatever was on his heart. Then just like I had come to expect, both times the pastors, who had NO IDEA what my testimony was, said, "This person has no idea I'm going to do this, but I'd like this girl to come up and tell you her testimony.". The first time was at a Chi Alpha sermon during grad school, and the second was in a huge church in South Africa after a missions trip. At that one the pastor never said a word to me all week, except to call me the wrong name. But after our project was over, we went to his church service just to pass the time before our flight home, and he called me by (correct) name up to the pulpit.

Anyway, those were great experiences and the Holy Spirit was so clear about what to say, I went up with the verses I had just looked up and told my story. Eight years later it's a little more difficult. I think because I don't have the easy life anymore. "Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual, but worldly--mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it." 1 Cor 3:1-2. This time around I'm (supposedly) more mature so my part of the job is bigger. More responsibility. I've been broken in--just hours after the great news a radio station called so without any notice Yaacov and I told the story on the air. Over the weeks after that I got a chance to tell two more groups, each with a little notice that I couldn't utilize to actually prepare.

This time I've had TWO WEEKS notice. I can't just speak off the cuff, I think that time was a gift to help me prepare and say what actually should be said. Mark 5:19, "Go home to your family and tell the how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you." So, my job is to do just that.

Of course, it's tomorrow that I'm speaking to a women's study, so that notice has dwindled down to a day. But I'm going to make sure that everything I say relates to telling how much He has done for me, and all the mercy He has displayed. It really is such an honor to have such good content to discuss, the challenge is to prepare enough to be thorough but timely, and still say what He wants instead of what I want. I guess that's the challenge in most things, actually.

Oh, and by the way, He reigns. Ecc 3:14, "I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere Him."

He reigns!

Hello friends!
Thanks so much to all of you who came by the park yesterday to share in our joy and celebrate God's goodness! To be certain, God is great all the time, but it was an amazing chance to reflect on His most recent miracle.
A lot of people were there so I didn't have a chance to get very deep with anyone. That probably wouldn't have happened anyway because I was still processing it all. I think it finally hit me so I'll share what I can...

A lot of people asked how I have been feeling but it wasn't until today that it really hit me. I was driving down the road and put on an old Newsboys cd. The first song just filled me with the Holy Spirit and I was flooded with peace from His awesomeness. There's nothing amazing about the song itself, but the chorus is, "It's all God's children singing 'Glory! Glory! Hallelujah, He reigns!". And that is the summary of this journey. Because of all those people praying for us and passing the information along, people in all parts of the country and world  knew about this. Because of His mercy, love, and kindness all those people are now singing "Glory, Glory, Hallelujah, HE REIGNS!". No matter what your circumstances look like, no matter what junk you're dealing with, no matter what the naysayers shout, God reigns now and forever. One day everyone will recognize it, we just have to wait patiently. "As surely as I live', says the Lord, 'every knee will bow before me; every tongue will confess to God." (Rom 14:11; Isaiah 45:23).

I mostly feel joy today but I am also extremely humbled. I want to make sure everyone knows what He did for me, but I can't get past the fact that it is me He healed. Funny how I never once asked, "why me?" about getting the cancer, but I need to know why He picked me to be healed. It doesn't matter, of course, and I'm so grateful I can't even handle it.

There are a few things I am certain of: 1. My "believer's prayer" from Mark 11:23-24 (discussed a few days before the results) was the hardest, scariest part of my life and I know the way I attempted it pleased Him. I had to wrestle with it, go against all common sense as well as the believer's I spoke to about it. I believe I had to face all that and declare it publicly before I could be healed. To be clear though, I do NOT believe I did something to "earn" this miracle, any more than I "earned" my salvation. But I did need to get it together, and that included stretching myself and my faith farther than I would have guessed it could go.

2. There were multiple purposes for all this. I believe one was to get so many people praying and allow them to witness the miracle. It is very important to me that it's clear that you're all part of the body who prayed in unison. No one/part is more important than another, so you should all reap the benefits of getting to share the good news and not feel insignificant. Galatians 1:6 says, "As for those who seemed to be important--whatever they were makes no difference to me; God does not judge by external appearance--those men added nothing to my message." So, for those of you who prayed and believed, embrace the fact that He answered in such a big, big way. He did this great thing for you, for me, and for HIM and His glory. We should all be praying Rev. 4:11, "You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; for you created all things and by your will they were created and have their being."

3. This experience has helped me grow in faith and I know of several others who feel the same. I have a renewed thirst for the word and can't get enough of it. I had gotten lazy with God and will pray and try not to do that more. I suspect there are some I haven't spoken to yet who are unsure how to deepen their relatioships with God. Please don't be afraid to ask. If you don't know someone safe to ask, send me an email and I can try to help or find you someone. Most importantly though, God is the one with all the answers so start with reading the Bible (try John maybe).

I'm praying a lot for everyone who has supported us through this journey because when God moves satan often follows. So be aware and "do not give the devil a foothold" (Ephesians 4:27).