Barbara Holloway left the earth early Wednesday morning. Since then I waited to post this in case I got some amazing revelation that improved the tone of the post, but that just hasn't happened. She was a very strong and devoted believer and we know she is in her rightful place, at the "beginning" of eternity with the Lord.
Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
There are no more tears or regrets in heaven. There is no more sin. Nothing to dread. No hurt feelings, pain, or sorrow. She got to go where we all should be. Where we all would have been if it weren't for the sin that Eve (first) committed in the garden. Barbara left this nomadic life where she was a stranger and didn't fully belong for the only place that isn't true. She made it to the end of the long race, where the Lord greeted her with His passionate joy and love.
We should all rejoice that Barbara is in heaven. Instead of coveting our neighbor's car/job/house/husband/well-mannered children/toned body/savings account/friends (pick whatever best applies), we should covet her new life. She is home and we are not.
But there is one problem: She didn't want to go.
On the surface, and maybe a few layers beneath that, it feels like the ultimate betrayal by the Father. He promises, "If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you." (John 15:7). I assure you without any hesitation or confusion, Barbara asked to be healed and to stay on earth. She asked time after time. I'm told thousands were praying for her. She wholeheartedly believed He would heal her, until the very last agonizing breath, she believed He would answer that prayer.
We can rejoice that she really was healed, but let's not pretend that was the answer she was looking for. She asked to be healed on earth and He chose not to do that. He could have done it but He knew better. He alone knows what is best for you, best for me, best for Barbara. He knows what God-glorifying things will happen on earth because her time on earth ended. He knows what other pain or problems she avoided by moving to heaven. He created her, you, me, and everything on the earth. He numbers and ordains all of our days, and He makes no mistakes.