Wednesday, December 28, 2011

God the Father

Matthew 7:11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

Last night Naomi was sleeping in my arms while I was sad. I couldn't wipe the tears from my eyes for fear of waking her, so I let them fall off my face and felt them land at the same time as hairs that were falling out of my head. Just as I inhaled to really lose it, God enveloped me with His love instead. I had been in the middle of praying for Naomi--that she wouldn't go through this pain with or because of me--and felt His answer so clearly. Instead of assurance that she won't suffer from this, I received what He knew I needed--a reminder that He is looking down at me the same way I look at her. I felt strongly that it pains Him as much to see me hurting as it does for me to think of my girls hurting. More, probably. 


I know that God is love, and that He created me in His image. But somehow it's really hard to see and accept this fatherly-style of love. I don't know if everyone struggles with this, or why it's an issue with me, but it is. I hope I can retain this one in my long term memory for once. This cancer issue is part of His plan, but that doesn't mean He has turned off the sensitivity meter and left me to free fall. Pain and trials are difficult to go through for us and for Him as our Father. I am so grateful to have my loving sovereign father (as well as an awesome earthly one!)!

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 :Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

4 comments:

  1. Keep venting through your writing,its a blessing. Thanks

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  2. Jesus is in this boat with you rowing

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  3. Dear Erin
    i am in a Bible study in MI praying for you. My son is a cancer and bone marrow transplant survivor. He was 4 when diagnosed. He had terrible odds against him, but as you KNOW our LORD does not have to submit to this world's rules; it is the other way around. My son is now 9 and in perfect health. The WORD of GOD is the Only TRUTH you need to listen to. JESUS is still our healer, yesterday, today and forever. Do not let anyone convince you otherwise. i don't know why things often have to get soo bad and worse before they get better, take heart, stand firm and WAIT WAIT WAIT for the LORD!! He will show up!! HE promises to bring healing in His wings!!! i would love to encourage you more. Hopefully my son's 10 min video will encourage you and you can leave me a message at the site below if you'd like to communicate. As i said, i've fought this beast, i understand the fear and pain, and i KNOW by Golly you WILL WIN because the WORD says so... let me encourage you when you are feeling weary.
    www.vimeo.com/1593009
    www.caringbridge.org/visit/blasebyrd
    much love and hugs
    another mom who cares.

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  4. Tami, thanks so much for sharing. I was actually praying alongside you when Blase was sick (my mom either met you or your friends in a study back then). I never saw the video or got many details until now, it is so amazing what God has done. I (surprise, surprise) cried through the whole video and am so very glad you shared. Much love to you and your amazing family!

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